Great is Thy Faithfulness

“Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, ‘The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.’” Lamentations 3:22-24

I woke up this morning with the song, “Great is Thy Faithfulness,” on my mind. Tomorrow, it will be a year since our son suddenly went to be with Jesus. And I have to admit that during the past few weeks, I have once again experienced a higher level of unsettledness in my emotion. But each time the emotion surfaces, God’s Spirit within me quietly reminds me, “I have been with you every day and I will continue to be with you. Keep your eyes on me.”

And then I begin to recount the ways God has been faithful. There is not much use in dwelling on the theology or doctrine of suffering. If we learn nothing else from Job, we can see that the arguing of doctrine among his friends only took Job further from his source of comfort. What Job craved was communion and comfort from God. When God finally spoke, the first words out were, “Who is this that darkens my counsel with words without knowledge? Brace yourself like a man; I will question you, and you shall answer me. Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me, if you understand. Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know! Who stretched a measuring line across it? On what were its footings set, or who laid its cornerstone – while the morning stars sang together and all the angels shouted for joy?” Job 38:2-7

Job’s response was meek. “Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know… My ears have heard of you but now my eyes have seen you. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes.” Job 42:3b, 5-6

It is so easy to think that we are in control of our own little worlds – if I do this, then that will happen. We design our own “truth” and believe that the total results in our lives are dependent upon what we say and do. We forget that we are created beings and there is a God whose wisdom and knowledge are far beyond anything we can think or imagine. Paul says, “Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.” I Corinthians 13:12 He is reminding us that God has the whole picture and we only see a reflection or shadow of it.

As I recount the journey we have been on, I realize that God has provided everything we have needed every step of the way. In fact, He has gone before us teaching us and assuring us of His great love, providing friendships 30 years before that even though ‘dormant’ would rise and nurture and comfort us. He took us through ‘trial runs’ as friends suffered great loss and shared what they were learning through their experiences. He prepared us spiritually and emotionally to be able to stand through this trial even though it took us right to the edge of being able to physically breathe.

He blessed us with much joy and great relationship with both of our sons. He provided especially sweet times in the weeks before and even the day before through a special phone call with even the detail of how to set the mirrors on his car so I could drive it safely in heavy traffic.

He blessed us with family and friends who took care of us, nurtured us, thought for us when we couldn’t think for ourselves, and prayed with us when we were too weak to go on. He dried our tears and continues to dry our tears as we look up and see that He is using even our tragedy to His honor and glory. More and more people are finding new and deeper relationship with God as they realize their own mortality and see what God has done for us and will do for them. No one is promised their next breath, and as we realize that, we look to God who removes fear of death and promises eternity with Him.

Friendships have blossomed and grown as we comfort each other. Family are not the only ones who feel the pain when someone leaves us. Friends hurt deeply as well – especially when the friendship was deep and valued. And as we navigate our pain and learn from our own suffering, we become more able to comfort others on their journeys of pain and suffering as well. “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows.” II Corinthians 1:3-5

And here we are, one year later… God has walked with me one day at a time. The fellowship is deep and comforting. I will never be the same. The trajectory of my life has changed. I now understand so much more what Jesus accomplished through His resurrection. Yes, He gave us the gift of forgiveness of sins and of eternal life through that. But He also gave us the gift of living free from the fear of death. “Since the children have flesh and blood, He too shared in their humanity so that by His death He might destroy him who holds the power of death—that is, the devil—and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death.” Hebrews 2:14-15

While I live, I no longer fear death. But something else has changed. I understand so much more about heaven and going to live with Christ there. “Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.” John 14:1-3 Jesus was comforting His disciples before His death on the cross. I understand more now that the disciples were grieved over losing their friend and Christ was telling them, “This isn’t the end… we will see each other again.” This is not a final good-bye but rather a passage. Our son simply went before us and we will see him again soon, just as Christ went before the disciples and promised them they would see Him again soon.

I understand also why the disciples and Paul were able to live their lives with abandon. Paul put it quite clearly when he said, “For me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.” Philippians 1:21 Every day I walk on this earth, I enjoy fellowship with my Father and I am grateful for every breath He gives me. But if I die, it will only get better. It is not the end. It is the beginning of a new life with Christ for eternity. I look forward to that.

In the meantime, “Your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” Matthew 6:10 I understand that this is a fallen world and not God’s best for us. That is to come. But while I am here, God has things for me to do. He is at work even now on this earth and I am His servant – one day at a time walking hand in hand with God.