Intimacy with God

Friendship is a good thing. We all need friends. When I meet a friend for coffee, we usually express delight to see each other as we greet and prepare to spend some time together. We look forward to the encounter and we listen to each other’s hearts as we share our lives with each other. And when we part, we often make plans to meet again soon and anticipate that time of fellowship together.

What does it look like when I meet with God? Do I sometimes blow Him off because I am too busy? “Sorry God, just no time for you today. I need another hour of sleep and then I have lots to do.” Do I go through a routine that I designed to discipline myself to do ‘morning devotions’? I read so many chapters of the Bible. Yes, yes, I’ve read it before. I know what it says. I pull out my list of prayer requests and read through it. God be with this person. Heal that person. Give them what they want. And then rush into my day with no other thought of God and muscle through my activities whatever they are.

Jesus had much grace with the disciples as He instructed them in the years He spent with them. I think He has much grace for us too as we learn who He is and how to relate to Him. James and John wanted to be important in His kingdom. Philip struggled with trusting Jesus to come through. Peter thought he could handle it all until he found himself denying Jesus not once but three times! Somehow, when we come to the end of ourselves, we finally begin to look for Jesus.

The more I understand who God is, the more I get up in the morning with anticipation of our time together. The more I am overwhelmed by His love – that He would pay attention to me! The God who created the heaven and the earth and all that is in it would want to meet with me each day and share His heart with me! He has given me the privilege of praying – not so I can control the things happening around me, but so that I can join His heart for the people He cares about. He allows me to participate in the work He is doing!

“The faithful love of the Lord never ends! His mercies never cease. Great is His faithfulness; His mercies begin afresh each morning. I say to myself, “The Lord is my inheritance; therefore, I will hope in Him!” Lamentations 3:22-24 Jeremiah pens these verses in the middle of lamenting being homeless and grieving all that he has lost. And following these verses, he expresses his hope that he has found in knowing God’s love. He is able to worship God in the most dire of circumstances. Paul and Silas worshiped God while sitting in prison because they knew they were loved.

God has invited us to seek Him and to desire to be in His presence. “In those days when you pray, I will listen. If you look for me wholeheartedly, you will find me.” Jeremiah 29:12-13 “Keep on asking, and you will receive what you ask for. Keep on seeking, and you will find. Keep on knocking, and the door will be opened to you. For everyone who asks, receives. Everyone who seeks, finds. And to everyone who knocks, the door will be opened.” Matthew 7:7-8

God is not hiding from us. He is right here in our midst, inviting us to come, rest in Him, receive nurture and friendship, and be loved. Meeting with Him isn’t a discipline, it is a privilege and an act of love for each other! When I have truly given and received that love, I am free to love others well. I John 4-5 lay out a beautiful picture of what it means to be loved by God and how that effects the way we behave toward others.  Our time of worship, listening, sharing, and receiving from God daily is so important to our relationship with God and it is what feeds our relationships with each other. I sure don’t want to miss that. Do you?

Great is Thy Faithfulness

“Because of the LORD’s great love we are not consumed, for his compassions never fail. They are new every morning; great is your faithfulness. I say to myself, ‘The LORD is my portion; therefore I will wait for him.’” Lamentations 3:22-24

I woke up this morning with the song, “Great is Thy Faithfulness,” on my mind. Tomorrow, it will be a year since our son suddenly went to be with Jesus. And I have to admit that during the past few weeks, I have once again experienced a higher level of unsettledness in my emotion. But each time the emotion surfaces, God’s Spirit within me quietly reminds me, “I have been with you every day and I will continue to be with you. Keep your eyes on me.”

And then I begin to recount the ways God has been faithful. There is not much use in dwelling on the theology or doctrine of suffering. If we learn nothing else from Job, we can see that the arguing of doctrine among his friends only took Job further from his source of comfort. What Job craved was communion and comfort from God. When God finally spoke, the first words out were, “Who is this that darkens my counsel with words without knowledge? Brace yourself like a man; I will question you, and you shall answer me. Where were you when I laid the earth’s foundation? Tell me, if you understand. Who marked off its dimensions? Surely you know! Who stretched a measuring line across it? On what were its footings set, or who laid its cornerstone – while the morning stars sang together and all the angels shouted for joy?” Job 38:2-7

Job’s response was meek. “Surely I spoke of things I did not understand, things too wonderful for me to know… My ears have heard of you but now my eyes have seen you. Therefore I despise myself and repent in dust and ashes.” Job 42:3b, 5-6

It is so easy to think that we are in control of our own little worlds – if I do this, then that will happen. We design our own “truth” and believe that the total results in our lives are dependent upon what we say and do. We forget that we are created beings and there is a God whose wisdom and knowledge are far beyond anything we can think or imagine. Paul says, “Now we see but a poor reflection as in a mirror; then we shall see face to face. Now I know in part; then I shall know fully, even as I am fully known.” I Corinthians 13:12 He is reminding us that God has the whole picture and we only see a reflection or shadow of it.

As I recount the journey we have been on, I realize that God has provided everything we have needed every step of the way. In fact, He has gone before us teaching us and assuring us of His great love, providing friendships 30 years before that even though ‘dormant’ would rise and nurture and comfort us. He took us through ‘trial runs’ as friends suffered great loss and shared what they were learning through their experiences. He prepared us spiritually and emotionally to be able to stand through this trial even though it took us right to the edge of being able to physically breathe.

He blessed us with much joy and great relationship with both of our sons. He provided especially sweet times in the weeks before and even the day before through a special phone call with even the detail of how to set the mirrors on his car so I could drive it safely in heavy traffic.

He blessed us with family and friends who took care of us, nurtured us, thought for us when we couldn’t think for ourselves, and prayed with us when we were too weak to go on. He dried our tears and continues to dry our tears as we look up and see that He is using even our tragedy to His honor and glory. More and more people are finding new and deeper relationship with God as they realize their own mortality and see what God has done for us and will do for them. No one is promised their next breath, and as we realize that, we look to God who removes fear of death and promises eternity with Him.

Friendships have blossomed and grown as we comfort each other. Family are not the only ones who feel the pain when someone leaves us. Friends hurt deeply as well – especially when the friendship was deep and valued. And as we navigate our pain and learn from our own suffering, we become more able to comfort others on their journeys of pain and suffering as well. “Praise be to the God and Father of our Lord Jesus Christ, the Father of compassion and the God of all comfort, who comforts us in all our troubles, so that we can comfort those in any trouble with the comfort we ourselves have received from God. For just as the sufferings of Christ flow over into our lives, so also through Christ our comfort overflows.” II Corinthians 1:3-5

And here we are, one year later… God has walked with me one day at a time. The fellowship is deep and comforting. I will never be the same. The trajectory of my life has changed. I now understand so much more what Jesus accomplished through His resurrection. Yes, He gave us the gift of forgiveness of sins and of eternal life through that. But He also gave us the gift of living free from the fear of death. “Since the children have flesh and blood, He too shared in their humanity so that by His death He might destroy him who holds the power of death—that is, the devil—and free those who all their lives were held in slavery by their fear of death.” Hebrews 2:14-15

While I live, I no longer fear death. But something else has changed. I understand so much more about heaven and going to live with Christ there. “Do not let your hearts be troubled. Trust in God; trust also in me. In my Father’s house are many rooms; if it were not so, I would have told you. I am going there to prepare a place for you. And if I go and prepare a place for you, I will come back and take you to be with me that you also may be where I am.” John 14:1-3 Jesus was comforting His disciples before His death on the cross. I understand more now that the disciples were grieved over losing their friend and Christ was telling them, “This isn’t the end… we will see each other again.” This is not a final good-bye but rather a passage. Our son simply went before us and we will see him again soon, just as Christ went before the disciples and promised them they would see Him again soon.

I understand also why the disciples and Paul were able to live their lives with abandon. Paul put it quite clearly when he said, “For me, to live is Christ and to die is gain.” Philippians 1:21 Every day I walk on this earth, I enjoy fellowship with my Father and I am grateful for every breath He gives me. But if I die, it will only get better. It is not the end. It is the beginning of a new life with Christ for eternity. I look forward to that.

In the meantime, “Your kingdom come, your will be done on earth as it is in heaven.” Matthew 6:10 I understand that this is a fallen world and not God’s best for us. That is to come. But while I am here, God has things for me to do. He is at work even now on this earth and I am His servant – one day at a time walking hand in hand with God.